Little Mr Moffat sat in his boardroom, eating his curds and whey, when along came a spider, and turned into glider, and the plot ran away with the spoon.

Seriously, though, this episode better have been worth the months of waiting. My balls can’t take the ache no more.

From the Rogue Traders segment of Watchdog. (29/09/2011)

Couldn’t resist making this. I laughed too hard.

Hello Ryan, I’m a brown trout
What is that all about?
Talking fish.

He brushed a pale finger over the smooth skin, caressing it, loving it. He had dreamt so long of this. But it would be only the first in a series of meetings. His tongue stroked across his lips, the anticipation becoming almost unbearable. Slowly, softly, he pressed his lips against the skin, feeling how firm it really was. He flicked his tongue cheekily over the surface, before shifting the position of his hand as he moved in for the kill. Now his teeth began to pierce the flesh, biting deep into it. A trickle of moisture ran from the wound and into his mouth. A slight smile stretched across his face, and he began to grind in his teeth, severing the chunk to reveal a white inside. He ran his finger over it, licking at the pale interior. And he went to take another bite, his heart pounding in his chest, the sensation so exhilarating-

“DRACO!” snapped Lucius Malfoy from the open doorway, his eyes staring in command, “I have already told you not to fill up on apples before dinner. Come now, before your mother and I starve to death waiting for you.” Draco sighed, withdrawing his teeth and placing the bitten green apple upon his bedside table. He looked at it longingly as he walked towards his father, finally resigning to turn away from it as he stepped outside his bedroom.
——-

(No, I’m not taking this seriously. Sorry. Have a Short Fic* request? Let me know and I’ll do my best to mash something together.

*I will write any Harry Potter ships. For other fandom ships, I may be unable to help, we’ll see. I can do some Doctor Who shippings (mostly 9th - 11th doctor era).) 

I am, generally speaking, a very patient person, but when it comes to a wonderful television series taking a possible turn for the worse, I’m not so patient.

You see, I completely understand that there is likely a much bigger, intricate plan for the series that little miss muffet Steven Moffat has made, which is all well and good, (actually, there are many things I could highlight about that, theories, e.t.c, but I will hold my peace. For now.) but then we’re suddenly thrown a very singular episode with possibly no relevance to the rest of the series. Yeah, I like that sort of thing, and I get that ‘dying’ time lords may wish to venture forth through the universe and have a bit of fun, but not when a psychopathic time lady is on the loose. Really, guys, come on! A bit of timing..

The first episode back really got on my wick. Oh, yeah, there were comical elements, but it felt somwhat dry and irrelevant. Also, you can’t just leave Hitler in the cupboard. You need to let him come out. AH-HA-HA-HA BOOM BOOM! .. I need some rest.

(I apologise for any offense caused by this post. Please send complaints to the address below)